Category Archives: Taking Authority Over the Devil

Feb25

Hmm… What Should I Write About?

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Hmm… What Should I Write About?

How’s that for a title? I wonder if King David ever sat down to write a psalm and pondered on what he should write about before he started. I can picture him sitting before a vintage typewriter with a blank piece of papyrus in it. Now, obviously, King David didn’t have a typewriter back when he was alive. He had a quill with papyrus, so I’m taking great poetic license here. Regardless of that, however, it’s fun to imagine King David with a little bit of writer’s block.

Beautiful words stir my heart. I will recite a lovely poem about the king, for my tongue is like the pen of a skillful poet. ~ Psalm 45:1, NLT.

The above psalm was actually written by the sons of Korah rather than King David, but it’s my go-to Scripture as concerns all things writing, and I haven’t been able to find a better one. I’d love to find a verse where the psalmist talks about struggling to write, but I don’t know if one exists. There are 31,102 verses in the whole Bible, which translates to 23,145 verses in the Old Testament and 7,957 verses in the New Testament. There seems to be a verse for everyone and every circumstance, so maybe, just maybe, there’s a verse for people struggling with writer’s block. I just have to find it. O God, please help me find it if it exists!

Then, last night as I was sitting in my car reading in the book of Luke, God showed me something. My roommate had to take her dog to the vet, and then she had to go to Albertsons. So I went with her and sat in the car reading my Bible while she did her errands at the vet and the market.

I was reading in Luke Four, where Jesus was in the wilderness for forty days being tempted by the devil.

1Then Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, returned from the Jordan River and was led by the Spirit in the wilderness, 2where for forty days he endured temptations from the devil. … 5Then the devil led him up to a high place and showed him in a flash all the kingdoms of the world. 6And he said to him, “To you I will grant this whole realm – and the glory that goes along with it, for it has been relinquished to me, and I can give it to anyone I wish. 7So then, if you will worship me, all this will be yours.” 8Jesus answered him, “It is written, ‘You are to worship the Lord your God and serve only him.'” ~ Luke 4:1-2, 5-8 [Deuteronomy 6:13], NET.

What God showed me had to do specifically with Satan’s statement to Jesus that he would give Him all his authority if He would just fall down and worship him. And it occurred to me that there’s no way Satan would actually keep that promise. In the first place, Satan is a liar. Jesus said in John 8,

For you are the children of your father the devil, and you love to do the evil things he does. He was a murderer from the beginning. He has always hated the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, it is consistent with his character; for he is a liar and the father of lies. ~ John 8:44, NLT.

Jesus was talking to the Pharisees in this verse, but He was talking about Satan. My point in quoting John 8:44 is to show that the devil is a liar. In fact, as Jesus said, “Satan is the father of lies.”

So when the devil told Jesus that he would give Him all his authority in Luke 4:6, I don’t believe he had any intention of keeping that promise. He couldn’t keep it because if he had, it would have reversed everything he’d managed to accomplish since Adam and Eve gave in to him in the Garden of Eden. It would have been catastrophic for him if he’d done that.

On the other hand, if Jesus had accepted Satan’s challenge and taken him up on his offer, then Satan wouldn’t have had to give up his authority, because Jesus would have started worshiping someone other than the Father, which would have broken the First Commandment.

You shall have no other gods before me. ~ Exodus 20:3, NET.

You must not have any other god but me. Deuteronomy 5:7, NLT.

I think the Father, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit had a plan that They’d come up with before the beginning of time, before Adam and Eve were ever created, to save humanity, because They knew from the very beginning that we were going to blow it.

19but [you were actually purchased] with precious blood, like that of a [sacrificial] lamb unblemished and spotless, the priceless blood of Christ. 20For He was foreordained (foreknown) before the foundation of the world, but has appeared [publicly] in these last times for your sake ~ 1 Peter 1:19-20, AMP.

And the Amplified Bible included a footnote with the word foreordained from verse 20: “The Son of God always existed and it was always known that He would be the Redeemer of mankind.”

Additionally, Jesus knew in advance that He would go to the Cross and sacrifice His life for us, and He did it willingly.

17This is why the Father loves me – because I lay down my life, so that I may take it back again. 18No one takes it away from me, but I lay it down of my own free will. I have the authority to lay it down, and I have the authority to take it back again. This commandment I received from my Father.” ~ John 10:17-18, NET.

I like the way the New Living Translation transcribes it as well:

17“The Father loves me because I sacrifice my life so I may take it back again. 18No one can take my life from me. I sacrifice it voluntarily. For I have the authority to lay it down when I want to and also to take it up again. For this is what my Father has commanded.” ~ John 10:17-18, NLT.

I could be wrong about this. I’m wrong about a lot of things, but it makes sense scripturally. I kind of feel like I’m going out on a limb here, but I read it to McT, my therapist, and he likes it, so I think I’m going to go with it.

Well, I think that’s it. It’s taken me a really long time to write this post, but I thoroughly enjoyed doing it. It was thought provoking, as well as prayer provoking, and there’s certainly nothing wrong with that! Plus I learned a bunch of stuff into the bargain, and I love being able to do that. I hope everyone enjoys reading it!

Jul25

Silence Is NOT Golden

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There’s an old proverb that says “Speech is silver and silence is golden,” which is thought to have originated way back in ancient Egypt.

There’s another old saying that says, “It’s better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and to remove all doubt.” It’s usually attributed either to Abraham Lincoln or Mark Twain. In addition, there’s a saying in the Book of Proverbs that sounds very similar,

Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent. ~ Proverb 17:28, ESV.

Well, I’m here to tell you that silence isn’t always golden. There are times when it’s absolute hell. When you’ve prayed and are waiting for an answer, especially if it’s a prayer for finances or healing, you really hope you’ll get an answer right away, and if you don’t, waiting is the hardest thing you have to do. There are times when you’re desperate to hear from God because (for example) you’re about to lose your house, or you’re dying of cancer, so you really NEED the answer you’ve been praying for. Those are the times when silence is definitely NOT golden. Those are the times when you need to draw on what you know about God from His Word.

Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” ~ [Deuteronomy 31:6,8] Hebrews 13:5, NKJV.

Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. ~ Isaiah 41:10, NLT.

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. ~ Romans 8:28, NKJV.

11For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. 12Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. 13And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart. ~ Jeremiah 29:11-13, NKJV.

God is not a man, that he should lie, Neither the son of man, that he should repent: Has he said, and will he not do it? Or has he spoken, and will he not make it good? ~ Numbers 23:19, Hebrew Names Version.

If I don’t know anything else, I know I can trust God’s Word. God’s Word says God can’t lie and that He always keeps His promises (Numbers 23:19). Isaiah 55:8-11 says the same thing in a different way.

8“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the LORD. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. 9For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts. 10“The rain and snow come down from the heavens and stay on the ground to water the earth. They cause the grain to grow, producing seed for the farmer and bread for the hungry. 11It is the same with my word. I send it out, and it always produces fruit. It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it.” Isaiah 55:8-11, NLT.

When I’m struggling to trust that God is aware of what I’m dealing with right now, it helps me to know that He’s always with me and that He’ll never leave me nor forsake me, as the above verses state. In addition, there were people in the Bible who had to deal with God’s silence, and while I wouldn’t even think of comparing myself with anyone in the Bible (for example, Job ~ he had to deal with God’s silence for nine months, and I’m complaining about four! Silly me!)

I’ve come to the realization that what may be going on throughout this whole time with all the diarrhea and everything is that the devil is trying to convince me that God is not good, thus putting the lie to my post on November 27th of last year, I Will Never Doubt the Goodness of God (With God’s Help). The other day, as I was in the bathroom having one of my many bouts of diarrhea, and watching the ants that were inundating my bathroom and the rest of my apartment, and feeling discouraged and helpless and hopeless, because it felt like everything, EVERYTHING, is out of my control, all of a sudden I had a lightbulb moment.

It dawned on me that the devil would just love for me to say that God isn’t good, but I can’t do that. I can never say God is not good, because, for one thing, He is good, and His Word says He is, and His Word doesn’t lie. And for another, I know He’s good. I know with every fiber of my being that He’s good, and if I ever tried to say otherwise, I’d be lying, and I cannot tell a lie.

I made a vow to God when I was in the fifth grade that I would never tell another lie (after a whole childhood of lying because my father told me he’d kill me if I ever told the truth about what he was doing to me). I made that vow because I got caught in a lie by a policeman, and it so frightened me that I told God I’d never tell another one. I wasn’t a Christian yet, but I’ve kept that promise to this day, some sixty years later, though there have been a couple of slip-ups. I immediately made them right once I realized I’d blown it, because I didn’t want to disappoint God. Plus, somewhere in there I’d become a Christian.

Something else that may be going on is that the diarrhea that has plagued me all these months has kept me from going to church. I haven’t been able to go in about four months, because that’s almost as long as the diarrhea has lasted (almost five months), and I’ve decided that I don’t want it to be like that any longer. I like going to church, and the Bible says in the Book of Hebrews,

24Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. 25And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near. ~ Hebrews 10:24-25, NLT.

And I’ve begun to notice that everytime I make a decision to go to church, I have an attack of diarrhea bad enough to keep me from going. That tells me that the devil doesn’t want me to go.

Harrumph! I don’t want to let the devil win! I wish I’d figured out that sooner! I could have gone back to church a whole lot sooner! Well, I went last night (Wednesday night Bible study), and I was very glad I did, even though, physically, I felt awful. And the worship was wonderful, and so was the sermon. After it was over I went up and got prayed for and anointed with oil according to James 5,

14Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. 15And the prayer of faith will save the sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. ~ James 5:14-15, NKJV.

This post has evolved from God’s silence during difficult situations, to the diarrhea that’s been plaguing me ~ which is the most difficult situation I’ve had to deal with in a very long time. I haven’t published in over a month, but the reason for that is because I’ve been very ill. Fortunately, though, things are looking up. I finally have an appointment with a GI specialist this coming Saturday. I pray she’ll be able to give me some wisdom on what’s causing the diarrhea, as well as some solutions.

I’ve had the feeling at times with all of this that I’m dying, because I’ve felt so truly awful, and while going home to be with Jesus would be the very best of all possible realities, I really don’t think it’s my time yet. I still have things to do for the Lord!

So I’ll leave you with this:

24Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling, and to present you faultless before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy, 25To God our Savior, Who alone is wise, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and forever. Amen. ~ Jude 1:24-25, NKJV.

Mar21

Beauty from Ashes

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Today is my birthday (though by the time this is published it’ll be the day after my birthday). I’m seventy-one years old, and I’m so grateful to God that He’s brought me this far. I have SOOO MUCH to be grateful for! First and foremost, there’s the Cross of Christ, of course, but God has been saving my life my whole life long. His goodness and mercy towards me are absolutely unfathomable.

I wrote a post back on November 27, 2023, entitled I Will Never Doubt the Goodness of God (With God’s Help) that pretty much sums it all up for me. God’s goodness has been the guiding force behind my whole life, whether I knew it or not, and I’m so grateful to God for His kindness and goodness in my life. I’m kind of at a loss for words, because there aren’t enough words to express how much gratitude I feel.

4Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. 5You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; my cup runs over. 6Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever. ~ Psalm 23:4-6, NKJV.

I have a thing for beauty, and I feel like God has made my life into something beautiful. He didn’t have much to work with, because I was a thoroughgoing mess. Psalm 23:4-6 is my life in a nutshell. I walked through the valley of the shadow of death throughout my childhood, because I was always afraid that one or the other of my parents were going to do me in if I did something they didn’t like. My mother tried it a number of times when I was a baby, and my father threatened to do so if I told anyone what he was doing to me. But God was protecting me, so I really could “fear no evil”, because God was with me.

To me that’s God creating beauty out of ugliness, and as God has healed me over the years, I feel like He’s prepared a table before me in the presence of my enemy, the devil, because God and I get the last laugh. The devil tried hard to destroy me but failed, and between me and God, he will always fail, because my life is committed to God, and Jesus is my Lord, and the Holy Spirit is my helper and advocate. So goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever! AMEN!!

Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. ~ Colossians 3:16, KJV.

Aug2

Charlotte’s Toys

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Even though Charlotte still won’t let me near her, she is quite active in my apartment. Debbie, the woman from whom I adopted her, gave me a bag of food and a couple of plastic sandwich bags full of toys so Charlotte would have something to play with should she so desire.

Charlotte’s Toys

Charlotte seems to love these toys, because every time I come out of my bedroom when I wake up in the morning, I find them scattered all over the floor in completely different places from where I placed them the night before. And she seems to play with them ALL the TIME because even five minutes after the last time I saw them they’ve been further scattered and in different positions than they were previously. The only rule seems to be that she doesn’t do any of it in my presence.

The fact that she refuses to play in my presence brings up another, slightly sticky subject. She still won’t come near me, and runs from me if I walk anywhere even remotely close to her. I did manage to get her to sleep in the same room with me last night by virtue of closing the door to my bedroom immediately after coming in so she wouldn’t have a chance to escape. But I wasn’t sure if she was actually in the room, because it was dark, and I couldn’t see anything.

And, as it turned, out she was in the room, as I found out this morning when she woke me up because she wanted to get out, but couldn’t because the door was closed. It was the first time she’d made a sound since I got her, so I was delighted that she woke me up so I could hear her voice. She has a tiny, high-pitched, squeaky cry, but she’s still pretty little, being only three months old.

So when she started meowing I got up to open the door. When I stood up, she leapt into the air in terror and flew into the far corner of the room with her tail all floofed out. It was quite a sight. She’s such a pretty little thing with her blue eyes, but the terror she was obviously feeling kind of obliterated everything else.

Charlotte In Her Carrier Right After I Got Her Home

Isn’t she beautiful? I think she’s perfectly lovely! I just hope and pray that she’ll get used to me so she’s no longer terrified of me. I love her so much already!

The godly care for their animals, but the wicked are always cruel. ~ Proverbs 12:10, NLT.

So that’s the latest in the continuing saga of Charlotte!

Aug1

No Shame Allowed

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Every once in awhile something happens for which, unaccountably, I feel so much shame that I can’t talk about it with anyone. I was able to talk with McT and one friend about it, but it’s taken me several days to convince myself that I need to blog about it.

In a previous post (A Cross Stitch, New Kitties, and Two Smoking Needles), I talked about becoming the proud parent of two new kittens. Well, on Wednesday, the 28th, five days after bringing them home, Margaret died.

She died! What am I to do? She died!

I felt such devastation that I was overwhelmed and at a loss for words, for action, for anything and everything. All I could do was cry out to God, “My God! Why? What happened?”

About twenty minutes before it happened, she had allowed me to pick her up and pet her. This was surprising to me, as she hadn’t let me come close to her at all before that. Then all of a sudden she let me hold her and pet her. I cuddled her for about fifteen minutes, then she got down and disappeared, and I continued to watch TV. Then I got up and tried to find her.

I didn’t have to look very far, because she was on the floor around the corner from the couch where I was sitting, and when I looked at her I could see that she wasn’t breathing, plus her mouth was wide open. When I touched her she was cold and stiff.

Shock coursed through my body. What did I do wrong? I left fresh food and water out for her ~ for both of them ~ at all times, and I made sure that the litter box was clean. Plus I changed the water every day. Surely I couldn’t have done something wrong, but maybe I did.

Did I kill her? I was terrified that I had done something to cause her death, but I couldn’t think of anything that I might have done. I had decided earlier in the day that I was going to take her to the vet the next day, because she needed to be seen, and because she had been acting like she wasn’t feeling well. But then she died before I got the chance.

I emailed the woman from whom I had adopted them, and told her that Margaret had died. She replied that she didn’t think I was responsible, that Margaret must have had some kind of undiagnosed heart condition. She said she would pay for a necropsy to find out the cause of death, but after doing some online research, we both decided that was way too expensive. I felt like I could accept her idea of an undiagnosed heart problem, so we both let it go at that.

So now I’m left with the confusion and desolation I feel because of her death, and the hole in my heart that’s there, even though I only had her for five days. And as I said at the beginning, unaccountably, I feel a huge amount of shame. I don’t know why, but I do. Somehow, even if her demise wasn’t caused by me, it must have been my fault. There must have been some way in which I was responsible. It’s not logical, I know, but there it is.

I wonder if at least part of it doesn’t go back to Harry blaming me for stuff that I couldn’t have been responsible for when I was little, and for the cult rituals doing the same thing. There was one particular ritual that they did when I was about two where I had to answer questions, and if I got the wrong answer, a man was slowly lowered into a bonfire and burned alive.

The problem was, the questions were unanswerable. There were no right answers, though there was no way I could know that, especially at age two. So I had to answer these unanswerable questions, get the wrong answers because there weren’t any right ones, and listen to the screams of agony of the guy as he was lowered into the bonfire. And the whole thing was all my fault ~ or so they told me.

Talk about the essence of torture, both for the guy being burned alive, and for little two-year-old me!

But I’m no longer living in that reality. I’ve been set free from that life, thank God. And interestingly, I named the other kitten Charlotte, and she, thankfully, is alive and well, even though she still won’t let me near her. I discovered in the process of deciding on Charlotte’s name, that “Charlotte” means “freedom”. Maybe that’s why God motivated me to name her that, I don’t know. All I know is that before I brought them home, the name Charlotte was the only name I could think of.

“And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” ~ John 8:32, NLT.

And this is the truth that will set you free,

If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by confessing with your mouth that you are saved. ~ Romans 10:9-10, NLT.

As the Scriptures tell us, “Anyone who trusts in him will never be disgraced.” ~ [Isaiah 28:16, Greek Version], Romans 10:11, NLT.

So, regardless of how I feel, I must go on what Scripture says. If God’s Word says I am FREE, then I AM FREE. That means NO SHAME ALLOWED!! I did not cause Margaret’s death, and I did not cause that man to be burned alive!!

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. ~ Galatians 5:1, NIV.

Jul9

Revenge Is Sweet, Or So They Say

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That I can remember, no one has ever asked me if I’ve wanted to exact revenge against my father for everything he did to me when I was a child. But if anyone were to ask me, my answer would be an unqualified, categorical no.

I don’t remember ever wanting revenge against him or any of the people who hurt me. It’s certainly not because I’m holy or anything like that. I’m definitely no saint. I mess up on an extremely regular basis, and 1 John 1:9 is a well-worn and much-loved verse for me,

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. ~ 1 John 1:9, NKJV.

Another favorite, and something I cry out to God all the time, is,

O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? ~ Romans 7:24, NKJV.

Thankfully Romans 7:24 is followed immediately by 7:25,

Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin. ~ Romans 7:25, NLT.

And again straightaway after that comes Romans 8:1,

So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. ~ Romans 8:1, NLT.

I apologize for that little rabbit trail, but I’m trying to make a point. I am a sinner because I was born in sin, and because I was born into a world that belongs to Satan. Thank God, Jesus rescued me out of that world by dying on the cross for me, so that now I’m forgiven, and I no longer belong to the devil, I belong to God. But I still commit sins, even though I desperately don’t want to. That was my whole point in quoting the above verses.

Avenging a wrong committed against someone is something that really should be left in God’s hands. God is the only one who knows what really happened, the only one who knows the true motivations of the people involved, and the only one capable of dispensing perfect justice to all the parties connected to the situation.

Seems to me, if someone gets revenge, they’re trying to get justice for a situation on their own, taking control of it out of God’s hands. And while God does know all the facts, the person taking justice into their own hands will only know about the situation from his own perspective, which will always be skewed, because there’s no way any human being can know everything about what happened. Only God can know that. That’s why God says,

Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the LORD. ~ [quoted from Deuteronomy 32:35, NLT]; Romans 12:19, NLT.

I think people take vengeance into their own hands because they get impatient. They don’t want to wait for God to do it (if they believe He exists), or the legal system (if they trust it). Nowadays people don’t trust the legal system, or if they do, it moves too slowly for them, so they decide they have to do it for themselves.

If you think the legal system is slow, God is slower. You have to wait for the person you want justice for to die before you’ll get it. That’s why I say people get impatient. They don’t want to wait for God’s justice. Now, sometimes God will act through the legal system, but oftentimes He chooses to wait until the Final Judgment after the person dies.

I don’t know why that is, and it’s probably not for us, or specifically me, to know, at least not this side of Heaven ~ God’s sovereignty, and His higher ways (Isaiah 55:9-10), and all that ~ though sometimes I really wish God would clue me in.

But He doesn’t, and I have to trust ~ I choose to trust ~ that God is better at being God than I am, something I already knew, by the way, as I wrote about in a previous post (I Would Make a Terrible God). Because, as I said in that post, being God is God’s job, not mine.

So I’ll let God do the avenging for me. I’ve done the best I can to forgive those who need to be forgiven, and certainly there are many on whom I could get revenge, but I firmly believe that’s God’s job, as borne out by Scripture. I’ll let God be God and do my avenging for me. It makes my life much easier. I already have enough to think about without adding that!

Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof. ~ Matthew 6:34, KJV.

Feb12

Those Wretched Intrusions!

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I want to talk about something that every survivor of child abuse, and especially every survivor of childhood sexual abuse struggles with, and that is flashbacks. Anyone who has PTSD wrestles with flashbacks. Soldiers who’ve come back from battle often have PTSD, and one of the symptoms of PTSD is flashbacks.

My dictionary defines a flashback as: a sudden and disturbing vivid memory of an event in the past, typically as the result of psychological trauma. 

I have flashbacks on a daily basis. For me ~ and I think they’re different for each person because each person is a unique individual ~ they are distinctly sexual, and very distressing and disconcerting. Basically they consist of body parts having sex, and everytime they happen I feel like a wave of filth has just washed through my mind. When it happens I feel compelled to shake my head in an effort to jiggle it out of my head to make it go away. Doing that doesn’t work very well, but I can’t just do nothing. I also say to myself, “I cast that thought down in the Name of Jesus,” which I got from a passage in 2 Corinthians,

For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh (for the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but mighty before God to the casting down of strongholds); casting down imaginations, and every high thing that is exalted against the knowledge of God, and bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ… 2 Corinthians 10:3-5, ASV (American Standard Version).

Over the years my main way of dealing with them has been to spend time reading my Bible, plus I listen to the Bible on tape while I sleep. I figure exposing myself to God’s Word in every possible way has to help because the Bible talks about the Word having a cleansing affect,

For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. ~ Ephesians 5:25-26, NLT. 

The Bible also speaks of being successful if you keep God’s Word before you all the time,

Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. ~ Joshua 1:8, NIV.

And aside from all that, I just love God’s Word. It’s been my favorite book in the whole world for many years.

However, I find it painfully interesting that since I started working on this post the flashbacks have gotten worse ~ more vivid, more frequent, and more intrusive ~ than they’ve ever been. It’s almost like the devil knows, or my mind knows, that in bringing the problem out into the open its days are numbered.

I hope that’s true!! I would dearly love to be free of this cursed plague!!

So I submit my mind to God, and to the purifying blood of Christ my Lord in the hope of freedom and eternal life!

Thank You Jesus for Your cleansing blood!! I love You so!!

Nov13

Which Bus Should I Take?

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The title notwithstanding, this post has nothing to do with taking the bus, and everything to do with controlling my thought life. It’s a metaphor suggested to me by my therapist, and it made so much sense to me that I decided to write about it.

Yay for McT!

We’re all inundated with thoughts on a constant basis, and I’m no different than anyone else. The problem is figuring out which ones to listen to and which ones to ignore. And this is where McT’s clever little analogy comes in. Which bus/thought should I take/listen to and which bus/thought should I ignore? Especially when things get chaotic and overwhelming, and there are a lot of thoughts and buses zooming around inside my head, it can be very difficult to sort out which ones to pay attention to and which ones to ignore.

At that point I want to throw up my hands in exasperation and get lost in a good book!

ARRGH!!

Unfortunately I can’t do that because life goes on. More to the point, my life goes on, and I simply can’t let myself drown in the chaos ~ nor do I have to. I can take control and decide which thoughts I’ll listen to, as it says in Philippians 4,

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are honest, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report; if there is any virtue, and if there is any praise, think on these things. ~ Philippians 4:8, WEB.

Escaping into a good book would be the easy ~ and fun ~ way out, but most of the time it’s not an option. Plus, when I do take control, the sense of victory I have is palpable, as is the feeling of God’s pleasure in me because I trusted Him and His Word.

And I LOVE pleasing God!

There’s nothing better than that.

Jul9

In Which I Get In a Car Accident.

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I had an appointment with my estate-planning attorney yesterday. The appointment went well, but before I got to the appointment, I went to a McDonald’s near her office to get a mocha frappé because I arrived about ten minutes early. Unfortunately I managed to get into an accident in the parking lot, however. As a consequence I didn’t get my mocha frappé and I was about ten minutes late for my appointment. Plus, I was the one who caused the accident.

Harrumph!

It wasn’t a serious accident. No one was hurt, and the damage to the other person’s car appeared to be minimal. She wasn’t mad, either, which was good. I mean, she could have been totally steamed, but she wasn’t.

I got upset with myself, and I think I hit myself, but I’m not sure. If I did, it wasn’t as bad as it used to be, though I did use some bad language on myself. But this time it was much easier to forgive myself than it was before. It used to be incredibly difficult. I had to really work to pull the words out, and I was only able to do so after great effort, and only after I’d beat myself up a lot both physically and verbally. This time it was easy. I was able to do it right away after it happened; just, “I forgive myself,” and that was it.

The only difficulty I encountered was an unsettled feeling that kept hanging on and haunting me. But once I tried to figure out what was causing it, I realized that it was because the devil was causing images of what had happened to constantly run through my mind, making me feel stupid and condemned. After all the accident was my fault, and it could so easily have been avoided if I’d been watching behind me.

But I wasn’t (watching behind me), and I’d already repented for my careless driving, and I just refused to get all bent out of shape about it, so I told the devil to cut it out and leave me alone. Then I recited Scripture to him,

There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit. ~ Romans 8:1, NKJV.

I also quoted 1 John 1:9 to him,

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. ~ 1 John 1:9, ESV.

Satan doesn’t like hearing Scripture. When you quote Scripture to the devil he has to stop harassing you and leave you alone. That’s what happened when he was tempting Jesus during the 40 days and 40 nights in the wilderness,

“Get out of here, Satan,” Jesus told him. “For the Scriptures say, ‘You must worship the LORD your God and serve only Him.’ Then the devil went away and angels came and took care of Jesus.” ~ Matthew 4:10-11, NLT.

I used the New Living Translation here because that’s just about what I said when I told the devil to get lost. And he did, indeed, get lost, praise God! I no longer felt unsettled after I prayed, and I still don’t. I’m so grateful to God for His Word!

So overall, while I’m not glad I was in an accident, I’m pleased to say that I came through it better than I have in the past, and much better than expected.

Thank you, Jesus!