Monthly Archives: November 2023

Nov27

I Will Never Doubt the Goodness of God (With God’s Help)

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As I’ve had time to reflect over this Thanksgiving weekend, I’ve come to realize that God’s faithfulness has stood me in good stead throughout my life. Regardless of the circumstance He has protected me, saved me from the worst of my father’s atrocities, and kept me alive when my life was threatened ~ as it was on many occasions.

6So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in Him, 7rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness. ~ Colossians 2:6-7, NIV.

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. ~ Romans 8:28, NKJV.

The LORD will perfect that which concerns me; Your mercy, O LORD, endures forever; do not forsake the works of Your hands. ~ Psalm 138:8, NKJV.

And I especially like the way the New Living Translation renders it,

The LORD will work out his plans for my life—for your faithful love, O LORD, endures forever. Don’t abandon me, for you made me. ~ Psalm 138:8, NLT.

I can hear some of you saying, “Are you going to tell me that God is using what you went through as a child as a part of His plan for you?” Yes, I believe God is using my childhood as a part of His plan for my life. It’s an uncomfortable thought, but my childhood, as horrific and painful as it was, has brought me closer to God. Knowing that God was protecting me from the worst of the abuse, and saving my life ~ even from my own suicide attempts, of which there were many ~ has made me glad to be alive, and so grateful to God for His efforts on my behalf that my appreciation and thankfulness know no bounds. I’m extremely grateful for the Cross, and I want nothing more than to know God, and to know Jesus, and to know the Holy Spirit, and to serve Them. It’s the least I can do after all They’ve done for me!

In addition to all the other things I’ve described above, I feel a closeness to God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit that I never thought possible, and a peace and contentment and happiness that I never could have dreamed of, especially given what I’ve lived through. I can always sense the presence of God, and I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that He hears and answers my prayers regardless of how long it takes for the answer to come. I don’t want that to sound arrogant, because that’s certainly not how I intend it, and I know many people who really struggle in that area, besides which, I’ve contended with unanswered prayer myself.

I don’t want anyone to think that I’ve got it all together, because I certainly don’t. I’m a sinner just like everyone else, and I need God’s mercy and grace just like the rest of you. I get frustrated and angry the same as everyone else, and I have to cry out to God for help on a regular basis. I’m just grateful that He’s available for me to be able to do that!

8Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ 9and become one with him. I no longer count on my own righteousness through obeying the law; rather, I become righteous through faith in Christ. For God’s way of making us right with himself depends on faith. 10I want to know Christ and experience the mighty power that raised him from the dead. I want to suffer with him, sharing in his death, 11so that one way or another I will experience the resurrection from the dead! ~ Philippians 3:8-11, NLT.

I love this passage from the Book of Philippians. The all-encompassing, all-consuming desire of my life has become to know Christ, and to learn to love Him more and more. We can all learn to love Jesus more. There are always greater depths to plumb in knowing God. One of the best things about God is His mysteriousness! That’s one of my favorite things about reading His Word ~ you can learn more about Him by reading the Bible.

“I tell you, her sins—and they are many—have been forgiven, so she has shown me much love. But a person who is forgiven little shows only little love.” ~ Luke 7:47, NLT.

7The law of the LORD is perfect, converting the soul; the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple; 8The statutes of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart; the commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes; 9The fear of the LORD is clean, enduring forever; the judgments of the LORD are true and righteous altogether. 10More to be desired are they than gold, yea, than much fine gold; sweeter also than honey and the honeycomb. ~ Psalm 19:7-10, NKJV.

God has forgiven me of many sins, and as a consequence I love Him a LOT, and I love His Word a lot. Reading the Bible has changed my life in so many ways, which are marvelously described in the above quoted passage of Scripture from the Book of Psalms.

I’ve been meandering and wandering around throughout this post, and I’m not sure that I’ve made myself clear. I mean, I understand what I’m getting at. I’m just not sure that anyone else does. What it all boils down to is that, as the title says, I will never, never, EVER doubt God’s goodness, (with God’s help). He’s brought me through too much for me to ever doubt that He has my best interests at heart. I feel the need to qualify that never, never, ever however, because I can’t do anything without God’s help, nor do I want to.

Well, I guess that’s it! Maybe I wasn’t rambling and digressing as much as I thought I was!

Nov21

Kindness to a Fainting Friend

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I’ve had a friend staying with me for the last couple of weeks. She had emergency surgery and had no place to stay afterward because she’d sold the home she’d lived in off and on for over 30 years. It says in the Book of Job,

To him who is afflicted, kindness should be shown by his friend, even though he forsakes the fear of the Almighty. ~ Job 6:14, NKJV.

I especially like the New Living Translation of that verse,

One should be kind to a fainting friend, but you accuse me without any fear of the Almighty. ~ Job 6:14, NLT.

And the English Standard Version is even better,

He who withholds kindness from a friend forsakes the fear of the Almighty. ~ Job 6:14, ESV.

The second half of that verse is a little confusing, so I decided to include the ESV, because that version makes it much more clear than the other translations. I don’t ever want to be guilty of forsaking the fear of God. That would be a really dumb thing to do, considering I value God’s opinion of me above all else. Regardless, that verse forms the basis for the title of this post.

It’s been over forty years since I had a roommate, and the last time didn’t go very well, which was why I’ve lived alone all these years, aside from the fact that I kind of like living alone. I’m not accountable to anyone but my cats and God. I can do whatever I want whenever I want when I’m by myself, and especially, I can talk to God out loud and no one will think I’m weird.

I figured there must be something wrong with me, since I failed the last time I tried over forty years ago. It never occurred to me that every relationship is a two-way street, and that both parties contribute to its success or failure. Needless to say, I’ve grown a lot since then, but I’m still surprised to find that things are going quite well this time. My friend and I are able to get along without any difficulties, and we’ve been able to resolve any problems that arise easily and without conflict. Also, she’s a good cook ~ which is great for me, because I don’t cook; I nuke ~ so she cooks most of the time, and I’ve begun to cook a little too. All of which says that I’m becoming marginally domesticated as a result of having her stay with me!

How cool is that!

Having this latest wrinkle added to my life has given me a whole new perspective on things. Maybe I could consider living with a roommate ~ or not ~ but maybe a roommate isn’t outside the realm of possibility for me, as long as it’s the right person. I just have to make sure that it’s the right person, otherwise I’ll end up in disaster like I did forty years ago, and I really don’t want that to happen!

It would be nice if it was my friend, because she’s a known entity, and I wouldn’t have to get used to someone new. I’ve already begun to get used to her, plus she’s someone I’ve known for many years, and we enjoy each other’s company. The same things make us laugh, and the same things make us sad. She knows my background ~ in fact, she was part of the prayer team that prayed for me to be integrated out of multiplicity back in 2003.

So it’s something to think about at least. We’ve been talking about it, and I was surprised that she didn’t pooh-pooh the idea out of hand. I thought sure she’d reject it without even considering it, but she didn’t. We agreed that it’s an option to be evaluated along with all the other possibilities that are available. And we also acknowledged that, first and foremost, we have to pray about it, because God has a plan for both of us, whether that plan includes us living together or not.

So that’s it. In the time since I started writing this over a month ago, all kinds of things have happened, and I’ve become more and more comfortable with the idea of having my friend live with me. She had her surgery on October 14th, and came to stay with me after she was discharged from the hospital, so I picked her up from the hospital and brought her home with me. God is so good, and I’ve learned all sorts of things about myself since she arrived, most important of which is that I’ve grown enough that I can consider living with a roommate if she’s the right person. I’ve been quite satisfied to live with Jesus as my roommate all these years, because He doesn’t do bad things to me.

There are friends who pretend to be friends, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. ~ Proverbs 18:24, RSV.

A man who has friends must himself be friendly, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. ~ Proverbs 18:24, NKJV.

It’s interesting that the same verse could be translated so differently, which is why I included both versions. The part that matters is the second half of the verse, because Jesus is the Friend who sticks closer than a brother, of course, and I’ve learned that I can trust that He would never do anything to hurt me. I’m so grateful for that! And maybe I’m strong enough now that I can deal with it if I get into a painful interaction with a roommate, because I can go to God with the pain, whereas I couldn’t do that before, because I didn’t know Him well enough to know that I could trust Him.

It’s so good to know that trusting God can translate into trusting people!

Nov3

Leaping Tall Cats With a Single Bound

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Sometimes I feel like my life is a full-time, 24/7/365 cat psychology lab, and the only thing missing is the closed-circuit TV cameras.

I had to take the cats to the vet for their six-month wellness check earlier in the week. I was able to drop them off and let the vet do his thing with them, which was easier for me, but apparently not so much for Solomon and Gracie. They called to let me know that they were ready to come home, and they told me that Gracie was cooperative, but Solomon wouldn’t let them near him. I guess I can understand. I don’t like it when doctors try and examine me either, though I don’t try and bite them like he did.

I have to take him back in a week so they can try again, only this time I’m going to stay with him. Plus they gave me an anti-anxiety medication to give him the night before, as well as 90 minutes before I bring him in. The vet tech told me it would probably make him a little drunk, which should be interesting, but it should also help to calm him down so they can treat him.

The last time I took them in for a wellness check I stayed with them, and there were no problems. So this time I think he probably got weirded out because he didn’t know any of the people who were trying to examine him, and I think if I’d been there to act as an intermediary they would have fared better with him.

Once I got them home he was fine. He acted like nothing had happened, he hadn’t just tried to bite the vet and the techs who were trying to treat him. For shame, Solomon! If you only knew, you didn’t get out of anything. Your time is coming. . .

My cats really are a lot of fun. They keep me constantly entertained. You’d never know that they’re brother-and-sister litter mates, because they’re a study in opposites. Solomon is an extrovert, while Gracie is an introvert. Solomon is Mr. Personality, where Gracie is shy and retiring. Solomon is a big, clumsy oaf, and Gracie is feminine and dainty. Solomon lets it all hang out with his tail flung out behind him like a flag, while Gracie has hers curled around her feet when she’s sitting, and close to her body when she’s moving around. Solomon is really good at that look of wide-eyed innocence, where Gracie always looks mysterious, which is why I call her Gracie the Inscrutable. Solomon talks all the time, but Gracie rarely, if ever, says a word.

There are times when they’re playing with each other that one of them, usually Solomon, will run towards Gracie, and to escape, Gracie will leap about six feet into the air, bounding over Solomon, and make it into the next room. It’s hilarious to watch, and invariably they make me giggle whenever they play.

You may be wondering why I’m focusing on my cats like this. I pondered the same thing myself, and I realized that I learn things about God by studying my cats. I understand more about the way I relate to God ~ and the way He relates to me ~ by watching them relate to each other, and to me, and I’m always interested in learning and understanding more about God. Anything that will further my understanding of God is of definite interest to me, and if studying my cats will help me gain an understanding of God, well then so be it!

1My child, listen to what I say, and treasure my commands. 2Tune your ears to wisdom, and concentrate on understanding. 3Cry out for insight, and ask for understanding. 4Search for them as you would for silver; seek them like hidden treasures. 5Then you will understand what it means to fear the LORD, and you will gain knowledge of God. ~ Proverbs 2:1-5, NLT.

The godly care for their animals, but the wicked are always cruel. ~ Proverbs 12:10, NLT.